Escape of the crickets

Damn it! The dumb dogs… Probably the fat cocker spaniel got into the cricket box and dumped out 1/2 (30-50) of the LIVE crickets into my bathroom.
So me and I hubby were massacring the damn crickets… At first hubby was wanting to catch them but I was like “hell no there are too many loose…. Kill as many as we can, I don’t want crickets loose and breeding in my house….”

Moreover, once the current supply of crickets is gone I may release the remain toads. I’ve googled them and I believe they are a species native to TN as well as Florida.



Today is quiet day for the seminarians. We are communing at a local convent/abbey(?).
There is a labyrinth there. I walked it, barefoot.
Our walk with God is like walking in this labyrinth. The closer I think I’m getting to God/the center, the further I am taken from Him/it at the next wall/turn…. Sometimes I walk in a hurried manner in an effort just to finish and sometimes my walk slows down as i get deep in thought. Sometimes the mulch underfoot is annoyingly rough, sometimes painful, sometimes sticking to my feet…. A reminder of where I’m at and drawing me back to the purpose of my journey on the labyrinth.
Finally, I reach the center if the labyrinth. The feel of success, the resting of my body and the calmness of my mind helps me send a prayer of adoration and thanks to my/our God.
Then I must turn around and make my way out of the labyrinth. Do I chose the winding path back of contemplation and worship? Or do I chose the quick and ease path of stepping over the low stone lined path and hurry back to my changing life?????



2 good books for boys and puberty

Knowing that eventually I will have to have the puberty talk with the boys in the next few years….(bit early) I decided to boys the teen-body section. The 2 books I looked at were very good about intact care.
The what’s happening book was very informative on the foreskin and it’s uses
And the other book only showed intact picture drawings.
Very good!



K-cups and eBay…part 2

So my k-cups which “expire” this month came in already. Very fast shipping! Yeah!
I openness the box. Put some in my 24 k-cup holder carousel (spelling) and started my coffee machine.
What came out was highly disappointing. Very weak looking but I drank it anyways…. Then I used the same k-cup to make a second cup (as usual for me) and it came out practically water…. So disappointed…. Until I opened the k-cup holder portion of the keurig….. Turns out my dumb butt left yesterday’s k-cup in the machine and did NOT put in a new k-cup after all….. Needless to say my next cup of coffee was not disappointing. My soon to be expired k-cups are good!!!!
After all coffee isn’t just one of those things that go bad because the expiration date has passed. Now would I use expired k-cups that are yrs passed expiration? Probably not… But I go through 1-2 k-cups a day or more depending on if company is over so I’m not worried about the expiration dates too much. Heck, I never even check the dates on coffee


Would we ever adopt? Yes. Are we ready now? No. Would we be able to adopt a child with special physical needs? I believe so. Would we be able to adopt a behaviorally unstable child? At this point in my life no. Maybe if I become a better more patient person.
Would we want to adopt a baby? Not really. We would prefer to adopt a child aged 4 and up.

I feel God is calling us to adopt. I just know that we are neither financial or emotionally ableto handle that kind of commitment now.

K-cups coffee and eBay

So I’m trying to get used to the life of a student or student’s family and realizing I need to spend less. This concept is really hard especially since I just started beading again and beads anin’t cheap.
So eBay is becoming my friend again. I set the parameters and see what I can get.
Well a few months ago my hubby bought me the keurig machine. I ordered from big cats coffee and I was in heaven. Only problem is you gave to buy $75 worth of stuff for free shipping or shipping is almost $10…. So I turned to eBay….
Yesterday, I bought 36 k-cup of coffee from an eBay vendor. Great! Except the expiration date is 8/11. (this month, this yr)…. Well I’m betting it’s a “best if used by date” and the fact that each pod is sealed shut should mean the coffee stays fresh….
My point is.. I love coffee… I’m now poor… I must make sacrifices… So buying expired k-cups is my sacrifice…. I know it’s a pretty weak sacrifice but i love coffee so it’s big to me.

Listen to the bananas —

I saw this life-hack about how you can lightly trace notes on banana skins with toothpicks and then the next day the notes will show up like magic.

The person writing the tip suggested writing sweet notes for your kids on their bananas.  I promptly went and traced notes on all of our bananas and then immediately forgot about it, until the next day when I heard Victor screaming about how the bananas were talking to him.

I acted like he was insane and like I couldn’t see any notes on the bananas, and asked if maybe he needed to go lay down and rest, but then he was all “I recognize your handwriting, dumb-ass.  Why are you writing threatening letters on the bananas?” and I was like “Because we were out of post-its?”  But then I finally admitted that I was just practicing, because I thought it would be funny to write paranoid demands on bananas at the grocery store, so that when people get them home they’ll be all “What the fuck?  Are these bananas talking to me?  WHAT DOES IT MEAN?”  Then Victor just shook his head and walked out of the room.  Probably because he couldn’t stand how awesome I am.

PS.  I suppose you could also write sweet, complimentary things on anonymous bananas, like “You’re so beautiful” and junk, but honestly I think having a banana hitting on me would be way creepier than one telling me to “Act natural.  You’ll be contacted soon.”  It’s probably just me.

PPS.  I can only think of about 6 things to write on stranger’s bananas so if you have any suggestions, please leave them.

via Listen to the bananas —

sugar plum crepes with ricotta and honey | smitten kitchen

sounds yummy


sugar plum crepes with ricotta and honey

One of the things that has surprised me the most as I’m chugging my way along to my manuscript’s finish line is how little clear my vision was for it from the beginning, and how little I’ve erred from my original list of recipe ideas, as in real life, I am a bafflingly indecisive person. “What should we order for dinner?” can send me into a tailspin. “Which colander looks best from Amazon?” will lead me to read 30 minutes of reviews. And yet, half the recipes that are lined up for the book right now (except the breakfast section; we should definitely not discuss that again) are pretty much as I scribbled the ideas while my then-newborn was napping in the fall of 2009. It’s probably for the best I jotted it all down then because my brain has probably not been so centered for 5 minutes since.

via sugar plum crepes with ricotta and honey | smitten kitchen.

Toads and hermits

Well we did it. Against all online advice we moved our toads and hermits into the same large habitat. They’ve been together for about a week and seem to be doing well. In fact the hermits seem to be doing better than ever.
So the species experiment continued.
On a side note in sept I fly back to Florida and am going to see of I can bring 2 toads with me to re-release back in their natural habitat.

Kid anger

Insight for today: well I just posted a blog about kid’s anger…. And it reminded me of this morning. First when me and Samuel exploded like bombs and 2nd when we were at the park. At the park i was talking to someone and Samuel hit me to get my attention. I calmly corrected him. Later, he interrupted me again and said “excuse me”…
I was sooo proud…..

Here is a copy of the blog I just read: I did not write it. Website link is posted below the excerpt:



“Because children aren’t born knowing how to deal with anger. And once they do start to learn, they need practice. In a safe environment. And they need parents who model it beautifully day in and day out.

Which leads me to ask: How perfectly do you handle things when a car cuts you off? Or a friend doesn’t invite you to a party that everyone else is invited to? Or you lost a lot of money in the market? Or you didn’t get the job you want? Or your client is angry at you for making a mistake? Or your husband isn’t helping? Or your wife doesn’t get it, still! Or a co-worker stole your idea? Or someone didn’t show up for work and you had to do everything for them?

Do you always set aside time with that person to tell them how you feel in a calm way? Do you always look to see your part in it?

Or …

Are you quick to blame? Do you yell at somone? Or get in a fight? Or pick a fight about something else? Or ignore the person you’re mad at? Or not return their emails? Or pout? Or withdraw? Or gossip about them? Have you ever said something like, “You’re an asshole?” or “He’s such an asshole.” or “She’s such a bitch.” Or “Fuck-off!” either under your breath or to someone’s face?”……

……..”What kind of things am I talking about? Do any of these things kids do all the time sound familiar?

They spit. They may even spit at you!

They growl. They may even growl at you!

They call their friends stupid. Or they call you stupid.

They say that they don’t want to be friends with their best friend anymore.

They say they’re not going to invite their friend to their birthday.

They say “You’re yucky! Go away!”

They cover their ears and say, “I’m not listening to you.”

They may swipe at you.

They may hit.

They may fall to the floor and kick and scream.

What are the usual ways parents respond to these expressions of anger?

Some threaten their children, as in:

“If you continue with this behavior, you will not get _______” fill in the blank with a treat, or a bedtime story or tv time or the privilege of going to a party or the beach or wherever.

Some YELL:

“Stop that right now!”

Some ISOLATE, as in sending them to their room or giving them a time out where they are supposed to really think about what they’ve done wrong.

Some HIT their kids.

Some ABANDON as in, I’m not going to be around you when you behave like this.

And believe it or not, some still wash their kids mouths out with soap!

These are all TRAGIC responses to an angry child.

Why? Because they don’t illuminate, they don’t support, they don’t educate.

Not one of these responses will help a child learn a better way to express their feelings or even understand why they are so upset in the first place. It may (likely) scare them so much that they’ll no longer express their feelings to you, but it will not teach them how to manage and deal with uncomfortable, hard feelings. You may be able control their behavior by instilling fear but you cannot control their feelings. They will still flood your children’s brains and bodies. And those feelings will ultimately make their way out of their body somehow.

Thinking about this makes me wonder if kids who bully do so because threatening weaker kids, lets them do to others what has been done to them in some way.

The message that threatening, yelling, isolating, hitting and abandoning gives is this: You are only loveable when you are behaving properly. If you can’t control yourself, I will treat you poorly, often equally as poorly as you are treating me or worse. You dare to spit at me? I’ll humiliate you in front of everyone in the parking lot and drag your rude ass to the car. Et cet era.

Yes, you may be meting out your disapproval in kinder and gentler ways, perhaps you are only taking away a beloved toy, but you aren’t helping. And if you start with a toy with a four year old, you’ll have to continually escalate the punishment for it to have an impact. (Picture your teenager grounded every weekend.) Also, you’re ONLY telling them what they are doing wrong but not how to do it right.”


The rest of the post talks about a situation and how this mom calmly handled it….


Scream-free parenting chapter 5

I’m on my kindle so the reflections will be answered differently than usual with scream shots of certain pages.

Giving space:
Yes, I think I try to give my sons space… However, from reading this chapter I realize I don’t give them much freedom to be angry whereas I sometimes allow myself to indulge my anger fits. I’m not a good example of control so I try to control their behavior so it doesn’t mirror mine.
And yes the boys have not wanted a hug or kiss occasionally and I respect that. However, I don’t usually allow room for disagreement.







Post circ trauma one mother’s story

This woman’s story about her son’s post circumcision trauma is so heart wrenching.
This story was a guest post on the guggie daly blog… Link and excerpt below. To read the entire post you may need to copy/paste the link below into your browser.

In the end the baby healed……

“….. and I found a sitter for our daughter and drove down to the office. We waited nervously in the waiting area, and were finally called back to the examining room. We weighed Noah; exactly 10 lbs. In retrospect, I wish he had weighed 10.1. But back then, we were delighted! He had gained so well but could still get circumcised.

We stripped Noah down to his diaper, I kissed his forehead and the nurse and my husband took him back to the procedure room. “Its okay, Mom,” the nurse said as they left, “It’ll only take a minute and he won’t feel a thing.”

They were gone for about 10 minutes. The longest 10 minutes ever. A tiny bit of doubt crept into my mind. Was I doing the right thing? I could run out there and yell no. It wasn’t too late. But I didn’t. I didn’t protect my baby when it was most important. I let them remove a part of my baby’s body and I didn’t say anything. Anything. After about 10 minutes, they all came back. Noah was quietly sucking on his pacifier. The nurse and Dad said, “It went great.” Dad told me about how they used anesthesia and my son hardly cried at all. That appeased my guilt. The nurse went over instructions on how to care for his penis, and we went home. Noah fell asleep in his car seat, and at home, I transferred him to his crib. After an unusually long nap, Noah awoke, crying hard. I tried to nurse him but he did not want to nurse. I was concerned, since it had been about 4 hours by then. I gave him some baby Tylenol as instructed by the nurse, and then laid him down to change his diaper.

I remember it clearly. Laying him down on the end of our bed. Leaning over my perfect son. Removing his diaper. My huge gasp brought our two-year-old daughter running. She shrieked when she saw my son’s bloody gauze-covered penis. “Mom!” She cried, “What happened?” I explained that he had been circumcised, in as simple words as possible. She continued to stare, horror stricken. I gently wiped his bottom. I tried to take the gauze off as directed to put more Vaseline on there. The gauze stuck. I quickly grabbed my phone to call Nurse Advice.

My sudden movement caused Noah to jump. He kicked his penis with his heel. And he, oh my sweet Lord, he tore off the gauze with his foot. Blood spurted everywhere. Blood on my hands. Blood on the diaper. Red drops everywhere. Screaming baby. My daughter screamed, “Mom, why did you let them do that to him?” My heart dropped to the bottom of my feet. I got some more gauze and put it on his penis. It’s okay, sweetheart. Mommy is so sorry. Please, oh please stop screaming. Breathe, sweet baby, breathe. Oh God, what have I done? The gauze quickly filled with blood. More blood. I realized he was hemorrhaging. Oh God, have I killed my baby?……….”


Truth stands, even if there be no public support. It is self-sustained.
Mohandas Gandhi

Truth is by nature self-evident. As soon as you remove the cobwebs of ignorance that surround it, it shines clear.
Mohandas Gandhi

An error does not become truth by reason of multiplied propagation, nor does truth become error because nobody sees it.
Mohandas Gandhi

Even if you are a minority of one, the truth is the truth.
Mohandas Gandhi